The Muscle I Haven’t Built

Rest Is a Revolution challenged us to take our rest seriously, but are we open to receiving the rest that we’re needing?

I have to admit I struggle with this because my muscle to pour into my kids, my husband and friends is as easy as blinking an eye. I’m even open to the right person (I’m picky) pouring into me, but allowing rest to pour into me – what does that even look like?

I had to seriously ask myself questions like…

• Do I let a good meal, a nap, a walk, music, actually land — or do I rush past it to the next task?

• When someone offers help, do I take it, or do I find a way to still be the one doing something?

• Do I have anything that fills me that isn’t tied to producing or fixing something?

… and my answers look like sometimes, not very often and flat-out no, in that order.

This is such a stupid problem because it’s not like I didn’t need to be poured into – we all do, but the resistance is crazy. Yet, it still needs to happen so I’m going to work on this.

I know some of this is because my mind is going ninety north and I’m already thinking about the next thing before completion of the current thing. The other part is my not wanting to be a burden and wanting it done the way I want it done – pure control issues lol. Wanting to be productive is also an issue because I want every minute to be meaningful.

Don’t get me wrong, I ‘nothing’ pretty damn well but there’s always a fear that if I ‘nothing’ for too long the laziness will set-up camp.

It’s crazy and complicated, but it’s me in this season.