I allowed a situation to shake me off my peace. It was so disruptive that I stopped feeding my mind with focus, my body with consistency, and my soul with what it needed.
I knew I was off, but I didn’t realize how badly I’d failed to protect my peace until I got it back. I have to admit, I was lowkey pissed at myself for allowing the situation to shake me like that, but at the end of the day I learned how to protect it better because of it.
God has a funny way of showing us lessons.
My situation pushed me to my capacity. It’s fascinating how God knows us so well that He knows exactly what position to put us in to teach us what He needs us to learn. There’s no doubt in my mind that I’ve had this same experience before, but I wasn’t walking with God on any level, so I wasn’t looking to learn anything — nor was I looking for any positivity to be birthed from the situation.
We’re human — perfection isn’t warranted.
Being pushed to capacity doesn’t exempt me from utilizing the things I’ve learned about forgiveness, turning things over to God, and not matching energies. My personal standards say that I should be slow to anger, but I completely crashed out. Even though I lost it the way I did, right in the thick of my chaos I didn’t forget that I had a relationship with God, and the situation didn’t keep me from being thankful for another day to try to be better than I was the day before.
That’s progress.
It seems minimal, but there was a time in my life when a crash‑out was followed up with a grudge and maybe some additional harsh words. However, things are changing — uncomfortable as the changes are — but even with the stretch, I know I’m becoming someone I couldn’t have been before.
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